Big Finish Reviews+ Missy, Series One by Tony J Fyler

Oh Missy you’re so fine,

You blow Tony’s little mind…

Michelle Gomez’s Missy was one of the brightest and best innovations in villainy of the first ten years of New Who. That she would eventually make her way to audio was a conclusion that for many fans was foregone.

But Missy is not in any sense an easy proposition when she steps out of the light of the Doctor’s opposition and takes centre stage. Like the War Master before her (and for all we know, other Masters after), the trick with Missy is to make her as successful as she deserves to be without making everything a cake walk. She has to have her dramatic arc, but yet she has to triumph in her villainy.

This first collection of Missy adventures gives her plenty of gracenotes by which to distinguish herself in audio both from any other incarnation of the Master, and from the white knight syndrome of the Doctor, while sneeeeeeaking a story arc up on you quietly, just in time to go ‘Boo!’ and make you jump out of your skin.

A Spoonful of Mayhem, the series-opener from Roy Gill is a thing which must have seemed absolutely irresistible, given Missy’s trademark outfit and brolly – it’s Missy as Mary Poppins, taking two bored brats on whizzo jolly adventures, all the while with a design of her own. It’s an interesting design, in that Missy is trapped in 19^th century Earth by temporal powers who take a dim view of anachronistic technology and killing people (honestly, what’s a girl to do for fun around such people?). She’s aiming to break free of their constraints, which involves breaking into the Crystal Palace, riddling a Sphinx, and Missy the steam engine driver, putting the Circle Line to possibly the best use it’s ever had. There’s a delicious denouement to the piece, and both Missy’s charges actually do learn positive life lessons on the road to mysteriously not being zapped or squished or generally thrown into pits for a thousand years. It’s a confident start to the set, with a good dose of energy and enthusiasm, for all it sometimes lags by being told for the most part through the narration of Master Oliver Davis – one of nature’s hellraisers and no mistake. And this is perhaps one of the most notable differences between, say, Missy and the other incarnation to have their own series, the War Master. Derek Jacobi’s incarnation is almost an evolution of Geoffrey Beevers’; he has a smiling face, a sweet nature when necessary, but he seems to seep corruption into everything and everyone who comes into his orbit. Missy on the other hand is actually capable of being a positive influence, more out of boredom than any particular altruism. A Spoonful of Mayhem might be a carousel of adventures and prison-breaking, but it feels as though Oliver and his sister Lucy will actually remember Missy with some fondness and take forward some of the lessons about self-determination and seizing the moment she instilled in them.

Maybe.

Or possibly they’ll be the sibling Bonnie and Clyde of the turn of the century. Might be rather good fun to pop back and find out in a future Missy set.

Divorced, Beheaded, Regenerated, by John Dorney is…well, with the best will in the world and with appreciation to all the other writers in the set, it’s the best thing in the first series of Missy adventures by at least a couple of parsecs.

Why?

Because it’s hey nonny nonny Time Lord comedy with a Tudor twist, that’s why. Rufus Hound reprises his role as the Meddling Monk -or is he Henry VIII? – with a blistering, giggling energy that barely masks his meddling nature. And Missy stakes her claim to be the wife that wasn’t. There’s toing and froing and flirting and dungeons (which for both Henry and the Monk are pretty much the same thing), but there’s also, underneath all the rapid-fire banter, a coherent, somewhat subtle sub-plot which speaks impeccably to the different personalities of the Monk and Missy. How much meddling can you do before Anyone Important notices? Can Henry VIII have had seven wives? And when the weight of paradoxes is pressing on a critical point in history, who will blink first? Missy, or the Monk?

Divorced, Beheaded, Regenerated is an action-packed hour of rollicking good fun, and there’s absolutely no doubt that a re-match between Michelle Gomez and Rufus Hound should be encouraged – they have a comic chemistry that’s like tennis with cannonballs, and they’re an absolute dream to listen to. More, more, more of the Missy-Monk axis, please, thank you and don’t kill me.

The Broken Clock, by Nev Fountain, is a story that plays with storytelling and delivery, in the style of a cheesy American crime re-enactment show, complete with actors playing people who are actually there, and an initially irritating but also subtly creepy Voiceover Guy who narrates, for instance, the approach of someone’s death, fully aware that the victim can hear them. There’s quite a bit of wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey in this one, and Missy Masters, a Scotland Yard Inspector, is on the case to find out who killed whom and why – and what it all has to do with a broken grandfather clock (Yes, that would be your Who-fan reference detector pinging into life). The truth is actually rather gorgeous and demented, but whether you think it gets revealed just in the nick of time or just after the point where all the crime show meta-structure gets a little ponderous (people breaking character to ask questions and direct the action, for instance) will depend on your tolerance for the kind of layer-folded storytelling the plot demands. For my money, I was jusssst getting to the point of demanding ‘No seriously, what the hell is going on?!’ when, mercifully, the plot unfolded. Stick with it though – when you find out what actually is going on, you’ll go ‘Ohhhh…’ and realise quite how elegant the story is.

Jonathan Morris’ The Belly Of The Beast continues the style to some extent – there are reset points and restart points and loop points in this tale too, dealing with the lives of a slave mining workforce which Missy has excavating a planet that may just possibly not be a planet, for a treasure that is most certainly a treasure – and one that makes audio Missy, when she gets it (Oops – spoiler – she gets the treasure. Sorry, but this is Missy – of course she gets it) more impressive and deadly than ever she was on TV, and bodes well for upcoming box sets. You get to very near the end of The Belly Of The Beast without realising the nature of the story arc you’ve been following arguably from the beginning, but certainly since Divorced, Beheaded, Regenerated, and then everything clicks into place and sets Missy free from many of her past constraints, ready to terrorise the universe on a whole new scale in future sets. That’s the point about a Missy audio set – where on screen against the Doctor she has to ultimately lose, here, she gets to stand, and plot, and kill, and win.

The Diary of River Song Series 5, which was released first and so gets the credit of introducing Missy to the world of Big Finish, was a strong early contender for Release of the Year.

Missy Series 1 at least equals it.

Very Missy, if you think about it – fighting herself for the top spot on your Must-Get lists of Big Finish audio releases of 2019. Get ‘em both, you’re going to absolutely love them. This set though is Missy in full flow, beholden to no-one for her place in the spotlight, doing what’s necessary without sacrificing her fundamental mad-as-a-fruitbat personality. Missy was always one to blow your tiny little ape-mind. She’s found a new lease of life on audio – prepare to have your mind blown again.

Big Finish Reviews+ Cicero Series 1 by Tony J Fyler

Is Ciceronem mira, says Tony. With a bit of help from Google Translate and a Latin option.

When the first Cicero story, Though Scoundrels Are Discovered, was made, it was my pick for ‘release of the year’ from Big Finish – a Roman ‘detective’ story, with Marcus Tullius Cicero (lawyer, lawmaker and orator whose words continue to echo in our understanding of justice, power and due process today, played here by Samuel Barnett) and his brother Quintus Tullius Cicero (George Naylor) treading carefully through the pre-Imperial Roman world, where to cross the Dictator, Sulla and his friends was a terminally bad career move. It was Roman crime fiction with a superstar lead and a cast of nasties, that played like something between Mickey Spillane and John Grisham, with a final oration that sang with an erudition that seems somehow alien today, but which fans of President Obama, or hell, even fans of The West Wing, would recognise as having that ‘fire up the spine’ tingle that exalts us to be better than our base instincts. It was absolutely firecracker stuff from writer David Llewellyn.

If you’re going to make a whole series out of Cicero though, while it would be tempting to go the straightforward route of ‘lather, rinse, repeat’ and simply involve him in a sequence of cases without changing or evolving the character or his situation, Spillane-style, if you’re going to hold a modern audience’s attention, you have to focus on the people, the personalities, the power and the consequences of your actions. If you’re going to have a central character who, while pompous, is an archetypal ‘man of principle in a dirty world,’ you have to show what those principles cost, to him and those around him, otherwise we don’t buy in to the dirt and the danger.

Happily, Llewellyn is no newbie at this kind of thing, and neither is he any kind of slouch. Cicero, Series 1, does exactly what we’ve said it does – it focuses on the people in Cicero’s life, and the consequences of the young, upstanding lawyer being quite so young and upstanding in a world run by a Dictator (we use the capital advisedly, as it was an official title, that would eventually be overwhelmed by a line of Caesars).

In this series, we start off with that pilot episode, which established the Brothers Cicero – Quintus rather more disreputable and fun, while having an excellent ear for language and drilling his elder brother on making his words count in ‘court,’ and Marcus being somewhat priggish and overcautious of his dignity, but having those principles and that work ethic for which we can still admire him.

Moving us forward from that taster though, Llewellyn shows us Marcus, now suddenly a name to watch, choosing his next case, and coming up against a friend of Sulla’s, the altogether plausible senator, Claudius Decimus Arenius (played by Ben Arogundade with a fabulously massive voice, rich in intonation). While Quintus wants him to take a case of hedge-war between neighbours (one of whom is promising to pay – in actual, useable money!), Marcus finds a case of potential fraud in the slave trade, that means worming his way into the affairs of a political mover and shaker. That brings consequences to the whole Cicero family – and yes, there’s a whole Cicero family! Across the course of the series, we meet the senior Ciceros, Marcus Tullius gets a wife, Terentia (played with a glorious line in placidity laced with intellectual fire by Laura Riseborough), and we meet the in-laws too, including her father, Terentius, played by Jon Culshaw. Along the way, there are slave stories, accusations of impropriety with a Vestal Virgin, prostitution, mutilation, conniving with powerful figures – Sulla himself makes some appearances in Series 1, voiced by the note-perfect Paul ‘Treacle Tonsils’ Clayton, and an eventual victory that is at best mixed with disappointment and regret. It all reveals a world tainted with a spreading corruption, where the word of the Dictator creates its own reality, and if you happen to be a fact that doesn’t fit with that reality, you can be ironed out. With extreme prejudice, if necessary.

Which obviously bears no resemblance to our own world today. Not even a little bit. Nope, not a jot.

But besides the stinging, visceral picture of a world falling off from even the idea of the virtues it previously espoused, there’s also the progress of a brotherly relationship between the Cicero Boys that’s pressured by expectations from outside, by family loyalties and position. There’s a marriage which while still relatively fresh is threatened by a figure from Cicero’s past. There are dear friendships renewed, only to reveal how much has changed since they were last a vigorous bond. And ultimately, in a sequence which might be said to be just sliiiightly self-indulgent but is easily forgiven, there’s a choice for Marcus Tullius – whether to be, beyond a shred of doubt, properly, truly happy in his life, but to be forgotten shortly after his death, or to be prone to attack, to misery, to the plots of devious, deadly foes, and have his name spoken, revered and respected for a thousand generations. It’s a moment even younger listeners will appreciate, because it’s the central dilemma of the Harry Potter series – to do what is easy, or to do what is right. Llewellyn doesn’t overly sentimentalise that dilemma though; he clearly shows us that in this case to do what’s ‘right’ also flatters Cicero’s vanity and his view of his own potential. Still though, the point of choosing between an easy, pleasure-filled life and one fraught with difficulty and danger is clearly made.

Cicero, Series 1 is rich and gritty and rough and cultured and corrupt and principled and violent and complicated and brilliant and above all, emotionally true. It’s everything life could be under Sulla, the Dictator. It’s also five and a half hours of continuous drama (there are six episodes in Series 1, each around the 55-minute mark), created by a single writer as a single release. That means the chances of a second series probably depend on the mind and the calendar of David Llewellyn. Get Series 1 right now, and immerse yourself in Cicero’s world. Then join me in a plea for Cicero, Series 2, sooner rather than later.

We all need Cicero in our lives. This version of the great man, written by Llewellyn, is purpose-built to hold a mirror up to our own world, and give us a chance to believe that even when all is going to hell, we still have an individual choice to make, to be part of the problem or to stand against it, to be comfortable or to count, to do what’s easy, or to do what’s right.

Plus, it’s cracking audio drama to boot! Go. Go now – get Cicero, Series 1 in your lugholes!

Articles Where Are They Now? Greeks Bearing Gifts Cast

A young British soldier who regards women of the night, as creatures to hit, finds more than he bargained for when he chases Mary, a young wench, through the woods in the dead of night. Finding her again in a clearing, he raises his weapon, and shoots her. Shock apparent when she doesn’t fall down dead, but move with enormous speed towards him, plunging her hand deep into his chest to remove his heart, she admires how ripe it is, as the soldier falls dead at her feet.

Many, many years later, the body is discovered on a building site, beside a large metal ‘stapler’, which is later discovered to be a transporter device, held by two people. When Mary finds a way of entering Torchwood Hub, Jack is ready for her, and sets the device to ‘enable’ sending her away off planet, to the centre of the sun!

Danielle Denby-Ashe

‘Mary’

‘When I first got here, I found it almost obscene. My world was savage. Enforced worship in temples the size of cities, execution squads roaming the streets. Dissent of any kind meant death, or transportation to what they'd call a feral outpost.’

Mary possesses the ability to read minds using a pendant. She’s an alien who can morph into a beautiful floaty translucent being. She was a prisoner being transported when she found herself on Earth. Escaping after killing her guard, Mary found an English wench and used her body as host, but her body needed sustenance throughout the generations, and slowly, Owen Harper began to realise just why there was a gaping hole in hearts of patients through the ages.

Many people who love UK comedies might remember their first introduction of Danielle, from her character in My Family which was broadcast between 2000 – 2011. She played Janey Harper for 94 episodes. Her character wasn’t the smartest tool in the box but she was a likeable person. After Torchwood, you might remember her as Lorraine Donnegan in Waterloo Road, from 2009 – 2013, where I think her character was keen to change the shape of the school. In 2016 Danielle played Julia Lubas in Silent Witness and currently (2017/2018) is playing Gertrude for the film Heidi: Queen of the Mountain, which is still (Jan 2018) filming.

Tom Robertson

‘Soldier’

‘Do whores have prayers?’

The British soldier who naivily thought he could slap a woman around till she gave him what he wanted, bit off more than he could chew when he tested Mary's patience. Of course, when he aimed his gun and fired at the English wench in a Welsh strip of forest, she was no longer the woman who had previously scraped her nails down his face.

Since Greeks Bearing Gifts episode, Tom has a limited credit list for television, appearing as PC Turner in the BBC daytime medical drama Doctors in 2008 episode The Visit, and as a Designer for the TV Series Switch episode Designer in 2012.

Ravin J Ganatra

‘Neil’

'I was thinking of the Isle of Wight. Do you remember? We had that chalet around when Danny was walking, and the chalet was just full of spiders and you called me your hero because I wasn't scared. I'd just pick them up and throw them out... It was this perfect little memory. We were happy because we were together. And all this nonsense with Lawrence, it's fine. I forgive you, because I'm looking at the bigger picture now.'

Neil was only discovered planning his family's demise when Toshiko wore the pendant, given to her by Mary. Following him to his house, she whacked him over the head with a golf club in the hallway before he was able to fire off his shotgun. Not sure if she actually killed him, but I'm sure she gave him one hell of a bad headache.

Since playing Neil, Ravin has played many different characters, from medical practitioners, to Police Inspectors to shop keepers and more, with appearances in Coronation Street, Hollyoaks and The Bill, between 2007 and 2015. Ravin played Dr Dutta in the film The Boy with the Topknot in 2017 which was on BBC2 and should still be available to watch on iPlayer. In the television series Sept nains et moi, in 2018 he played Mr Kahn for 9 episodes.

As well as television, Ravin has also voiced the character Mahajan for Torchwood radio play Golden Age.

  

Eiry Thomas

‘Carol (Neil's ex wife)’

'I want him back at six. And I mean six this time. Kelly's given me ninety minutes after hours at the tanning salon as a wedding present. Besides, you're breaking the law bringing him home late. My dad reckons I could have you arrested, so think on.'

With her mind fixed only on her up and coming wedding, Carol thinks nothing of venting her frustration at her ex husband Neil, when he comes over to collect Danny, for his regular sleep over. Comes as one hell of a shock when she's staring down the barrel of a shotgun.

Since Torchwood in 2006, Eiry has appeared in 4 episodes of Belonging, 2 episodes of Eastenders, 6 episodes of Pen Talar, played Nia Morgan in the first episode of Hinterland - Devil's Bridge, which also starred Sara Gregory (find last name). Played Mrs Williams for five episodes of The Indian Doctor in 2013, Lisa Howell in Stella for three episodes, played Catrin in Byw Celwydd for 16 episodes from 2016 - 2017 and I think we all remember her character in Keeping Faith/Un Bore Mercher as DI Williams.

I remember her one episode in Hinterland perhaps more than I remember her being in Torchwood.

Shaheen Jafargholi

‘Danny’

'I don't wanna go. It's boring.'

Danny may have thought that staying with his Dad would be boring, but perhaps he wouldn't be thinking that after the day his Dad figured, shooting his family was like 'going to sleep'.

Since Greeks Bearing Gifts, Shaheen has played two major characters for two popular television programmes - Troy for 5 episodes of Grandpa in my Pocket, a CITV programme in 2009, and Shakil Kazemi for 146 episodes of Eastenders from 2016 - 2018. As well as an appearance on the 2016 Children in Need programme as his Eastenders character.

Alexander Hathaway

‘Mr Bond’

'Ah, Mister Bond, I've been expecting you. You are expected to die.'

Toshiko puts on the pendant in the Shopping precinct and picks up on thoughts by many people as they pass by her. The James Bond fan brought a smile to her face, just before she picked up the dark thoughts from Neil.

Alexander was also in the episode Combat, as a fight club punter but again uncredited. (must look out his character). Although many of his roles have been uncredited, they've been involved in some really awesome films, including his credited roles. From Persuasion, to The Dark Knight, to Quantum of Solace to Kick Ass. In The Man from U.N.C.L.E., and Mission Impossible - Rogue Nation, as well as television series Casualty for which he was credited as James Robinson, uncredited for 2 other roles previous. Plays Donny for Sunny Side Up which is in pre-production stage, and out in 2018.

Hugh Holman

‘Telepathy Victim’

‘Silence when the door opens. Can't do another night of the silence.’

As Toshiko heard the various voices talking in her head, thanks to the pendant, a young, curly haired young man in a long brown coat, strode along the boardwalk beside her, and on into the distance, his voice-over mentioning abuse. The voice of the victim was not actually Hugh speaking.

Since Greeks Bearing Gifts, Hugh has played a Footman, a Nazi Officer, a Student, a Cameraman, one of Camelot's Guards in Merlin. A Fairground Visitor, a Policeman, a Nobleman, a Diner in Sherlock episode The Empty Hearse. Was a Traveller on Walking on Sunshine. Was a Travelling Man in Everest. Was a Spact Zombie in Pride and Prejudice and Zombies - gory but fun film. Played a customer in Mr Selfridge series in 2016, and plays a Military Attaché for Entebbe in 2018. Only a few of these roles are credited.

Big Finish Reviews+ The Diary of River Song, Series 1 by Tony J Fyler

Tony makes a date with River. Ultimately, swipes left.

It’s important to understand one thing: I am by no means one of the internet’s rabid he-man River-haters. Written well, she was a great experimental character, with a unique perspective on the Doctor.

Yet her inclusion in 2015’s Christmas Who left me strangely cold. Perhaps, I thought, the Big Finish River would be a better essay on essentially the same subject – what does River get upto when the Doctor’s not around to take centre stage.

The Diary of River Song is absolutely, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that and more. Written by three old Big Finish hands (Justin Richards, James Goss and Matt Fitton) and a newbie to the format, the wildly-successful-in-her-own-right Jenny T Colgan, the episodes of this box set give a rich peek into the life of River Song as the star of her own life. The linkages between each of the episodes (and there are some – the box set is essentially one story in four very different tonal blocks) feel a little clunky and could leave you with a sense of “Wait – what just happened?” And sides of River’s personality seen only rarely on-screen are expanded, so you get a better sense of knowing her than you’ve ever had before.

In some ways though, that’s the biggest issue with this foray into New Who adventures on Big Finish audio – sometimes knowing more does not equate to liking more.

The problem surfaces in the first story, Colgan’s The Boundless Sea. While Colgan delivers a polished story that’s half Indiana Jones, half Stargate, with sealed tombs, people who refuse to die, sweat-vampires and mysterious robo-insects that facilitate a hellish immortality (it’s a cheerful one, you can probably tell), and it’s good to hear River actually doing some archaeology again, the problem of River’s personality rather grinds the gears of the whole thing. There’s a sense of River very much feeling like the star of her own life, always striving to say the arch thing, the unpredictable thing, as if with a cheeky wink into camera two. Add that to Alex Kingston’s relative unfamiliarity with the audio format, and what you get has a tendency to feel a little cheesy, like a laugh-tracked sit-com. Having been through the whole box set a few times, we can definitively say the problem there is not in Colgan’s writing – with a more naturalistic delivery, The Boundless Sea could have been both creepy and funny. As it stands though, it develops a kind of impatience in the listener, though the escalation of the sweat-zombie threat is effectively delivered and the solution is agreeably…messy.

Justin Richards’ I Went To A Marvellous Party, whether intentionally or not, bears a very strong resemblance to the mid-section of 2015’s Who Christmas Special – River, invited to a big party in space with the decadent, the deviant and the psychotically deranged. This time though, the psychotic derangement shows itself through the manipulation of planets, their histories, economies, societies and the like. For all those who think the world we know is secretly run by a shadowy cabal of string-pullers like the Koch brothers or the Bilderberg Group, Richards has a fun development – whole star systems run by the same kind of elite, for their own ultimate benefit, rather than that of the people of the planets. Richards also delivers far more internal drama, with a kind of Agatha Christie-style murder mystery among the charming psychos, and the mystery of a kind of anti-Doctor figure who takes ‘companions’ from the planets they control, patronises them for a while, then wipes their memories and puts them back. As people keep telling River that her husband is there and looking for her, there’s a good bit of tension developed as to whether this description could be seen to fit the Doctor, but for most of the episode, it’s a case of companions together sticking it to the arrogant, planet-running numbskulls, and given a more alien challenge, Kingston tones down the delivery and we get a more Sixth Doctorish version of River, investigating the deaths and fixing the bad guys, which allows I Went To A Marvellous Party to be significantly more diverting than the first episode.

Now, an admission. There are two other Doctors in this box set. Paul McGann as the Eighth Doctor turns up in episode four, but sadly, almost disloyally, we have to admit that Kingston’s River Song works much better with the version of the character she meets at the end of episode two, and who’s her companion all the way through episode three. Whenever the lists of ‘Who should be the next Doctor?’ come out, one name that seems almost allergic to appearing is Samuel West. There are probably good solid reasons for that, but his interpretation of ‘Mr Song’ in episode three is a thing that is enthralling and endearing, in the league of David Morrisey’s Jackson Lake or John Hurt’s War Doctor. He’ll undoubtedly be a one-episode Doctor, but West is great in the role, and – perhaps because it’s more familiar to her to be acting alongside a Doctor, Kingston shines in this episode, Signs by James Goss. Of the four, it’s by far the most comfortable listen, the back-and-forth between the Doctor and River eating up running time with a spoon, as a fatal dose of radiation tries to kill Professor Song, and the two go hunting for SporeShips – a kind of ancient, sudden death-bomb which appears out of nowhere, kills all life on a planet and then lets nature take its course rewriting the natural history of the world. The last third of this story is heartbreaking too, meaning that of the four, episode three feels the most emotionally complete and satisfying.

The Rulers of the Universe, by Matt Fitton, closes out this first series of The Diary of River Song, with that extra special treat – River working with a Doctor we know about, but who she hasn’t met yet. This one’s interesting, but a little overcomplicated for casual listening – River does A Thing which gets distinctly ‘timey-wimey,’ meaning you have to keep score and count, and you might want to borrow a friend if you’re using your fingers. Excitingly, this is an Eighth Doctor during the Time War that he’s still trying very hard to ignore, or at least not to get wholly involved in, but there’s a corresponding disappointment when it turns out that, as is actually perfectly logical, ‘there are rules’ about River playing with earlier Doctors. That makes perfect sense inasmuch as the Tenth Doctor didn’t know who she was when he first met her in the Library, but it also rather weakens River’s semi-mythic status – she keeps pictures of all the Doctor’s earlier faces, but given that she didn’t recognise the Twelfth Doctor in The Husbands of River Song, it means she’s only really allowed to play with one and a half Doctors – some of Ten, all of Eleven – and it seems now as though her involvement with future has been curtailed by the timeline coming full circle from her point of view on-screen. The woman who killed the Doctor, and the Doctor’s wife, feels diminished in stature by the need to creep around what she rather beautifully calls the ‘ingenue’ Eighth Doctor, even if she’s increased again by the way she deals with the self-appointed rulers of the universe.

Overall, Series 1 of The Diary of River Song is…OK. Is it one you absolutely need to listen to? Only in the circumstances that you’re a rabid River fan. There’s some serious acting talent spread across the four stories, with Alexander Vlahos (better known to Big Finishers as Dorian Grey), Alexander Siddig (most famous as Dr Bashir on Star Trek: DS9), Imogen Stubbs, known for her classical clout (especially as Desdemona opposite Ian McKellen in Othello), and Samuel West (known for all sorts of things, including recently Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell, but back on TV screens in January in Mr Selfridge) heading the talent pool surrounding Alex Kingston in her first Big Finish audios. And when the territory is more familiar, Kingston sinks into Rivering in the new medium well enough. But ultimately, there’s an entirely unfair but unavoidable comparison that intrudes. There has of course been a time-travelling archaeologist with a line in witty repartee and a habit of bumping into the Doctor in Big Finish audios for years now, and Lisa Bowerman has nailed Bernice Summerfield indelibly into our consciousness over those years. That leaves Kingston little in the way of wriggle room to establish the need for River to exist in the same domain, and her unique selling point – being the Doctor’s wife – doesn’t do enough here to establish that need. If you’re a rabid River fan, rejoice! She of the spoilers and the sonic trowel now exists in audio. If not, buy the Bennie box-sets instead. You’ll have heaps more fun with less of the relationship baggage.