Monday, 31 March 2014

The Coffee Shop Combat Caption Comps

‘Combat’ Caption Comp

Jack and Gwen in the multi storey car park

Claudia Lindner:  Jack: “Boy, that’s what happens if you feed a weevil after midnight?”

Rhiannon Cork New: We really should have kept John away from those poodles.

Betty Dee: Yes, of course we wanted Tosh and Owen to get it on – but did it have to be in a multi storey car park?  And why, oh why did they call us to witness it?  And where the hell is Ianto?

Rhiannon Cork New: And that’s why weevils wear boiler suits.

Jack with the weevil spray and the clamps

Betty Dee:  Hey, I didn’t mean it that way!  Of course we can have a romantic dinner and just cuddle on the sofa! Ianto?  Please, don’t walk away from me! IANTO!

Claudia Lindner:  “Told you, Ianto, these toys from that ‘Pimp your sex life’ online shop are SO old school!  Done that centuries ago!”

Betty Dee:  “Sorry, I must have taken the weevil spray instead of the lube.  Ah, come on Ianto, it was an honest mistake!  Can’t we still have fun?  You know...”

Rhiannon Cork New:  Ianto...2 words...lube and handcuffs, you up for it?

Carol-Anne Hillman:  Ianto?  Handcuffs and spray cream?  Ky and spray cream or all three? Yeah, in this alley!  You wanna roleplay?


The Doctor: Ohhh Arrr Captain...Show me what you got there.

Jack:  On many occasions when Jack and he played the ‘Kiss the person opposite’ game it was Jack he connected with, but on this occasion and high on some alien wacky baccy that Gwen had mistakenly believed was incense, the ‘kissing the person opposite’ became something a little more interesting.  Although it had to be said that puckering up to Janet was not high on his register of things to kiss.  But with lips pursed, a steely gaze, and slightly fuggy brain, Ianto inched closer and closer....

Betty Dee:  YOU!!! How dare you touch my coffee machine!!!

Annika Gabriella Brink:  Bitten by a common dog were you?  Oooh I’m sooo impressed!

Rhiannon Cork New:  “Oooo I’m pretty sure that hockey stick isn’t mean for that Jack.”

Carol-Anne Hillman Oh you are so gonna get it when we get back to the Hub!  Play acting indeed!

©BBC Torchwood 2006

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